“i knew i could not fully accept her
for who she was in all her imperfections
until i began to accept myself
in all of mine”
- Christine Marie, Breaking Free
❁ The Pathway to Forgiveness
Before we heed the path, we must remember and understand that forgiveness isn’t a state of being, but rather, a process and practice that occurs over time.
Like every emotion, forgiveness is something we mustn’t spiritually bypass. We must first, feel and acknowledge the hurt that is embedded within us, or the hurt we have caused (maybe towards others or ourselves). Then, we must understand the full impact as well as the karmic contract we agreed upon. Compassionate inquiry is really helpful here—so are the energies of patience, strength and trust.
Let it be known that forgiveness isn’t the act of tolerating someone treating you poorly, nor does it permit another to hurt you without accountability.
Forgiveness is acknowledging the hurt that was done unto us and choosing to no longer carry the burden of resentment, shame and suffering that causes the heart to close and constrict.
The embodiment of forgiveness releases you from the past, as well as frees you from no longer being defined by the circumstances. When we truly forgive, we are aware that no harmful act that was done onto us is personal, even though it may in the moment, have felt so strongly to be the truth.
In my recent newsletters, How Sisterhood Transmutes Pain into Power, and My Father’s Death, I speak of the forgiveness process towards my mother and father how it completely liberated me from unnecessary suffering.
The person that causes the hurt (whether that be from us or another) comes from a wounded, unhealed place within them. I want to emphasize that just because someone hurts us from a wounded place, it doesn’t mean that we need to tolerate or accept that behavior. In our full sovereignty, we have the autonomy to protect ourselves, put up our rightful boundaries, and request to be treated in a more healthy, supportive manner.
But in order to come into this place of true forgiveness, we cannot overstep the grieving process of the unresolved hurt, anger, sadness and disappointment we have taken on from the action or behavior itself.
When we truly forgive, we no longer identify from the victim state consciousness that keeps us stuck in the hurt. From this release, we then raise our vibration to a higher state of being, where more love, empathy, compassion and inspiration can flow more easily.
When we experience that divine flow, that Universal love that yearns to be expressed through us, it magnetizes the people, places, things and circumstances towards our newly matched vibration that will support us on our path.
Clarity on who we are and why we are here will come into fruition, and we will be reminded of our sacred belonging and contribution to this world.
❁ A Sacred Invitation (Your Turn!)
Dear one, who are you being called to forgive?
What can this forgiveness liberate you from?
What do you imagine is on the other side of forgiveness?
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